(no subject)

[tracy_loo_who]

So today I... signed up for spn_j2_bigbang. >.<

Yes, I realize this is near the top of the list of Most Asinine Things Tracy Has Ever Done, right up there with neglecting to close the window blinds after a shower that one highly embarrassing night many years back until the neighbors -- I digress. This isn't even something I'd considered a week ago, but everyone and their cat was posting about it so I looked and realized it was 20,000 words rather than 50,000, which is the number that's been stuck in my head since the original big_bang_hd in '05. It's still about four times longer than anything I've ever written on my own, but the deadline is far enough away that a false sense of security has settled over me. And I just (finally) read strangeandcharm's epic, bunk-friendly Melting 'verse and am feeling inspired.

Plus there was that discussion over at spn_castiel last week, where the poster said he/she just couldn't see Dean/Castiel. couldn't see how it could happen, for Dean especially. Obviously I see it, but it's a valid point -- so far all the fics I've read/written gloss over a lot of the necessary steps between "I'm the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition" and "oh god fuck me", or else use some cleverly convenient plot device. So, in the spirit of big_bang_hd, I'm going to try to write that definitive Dean/Castiel story, try to show how it could happen in canon. Try being the key word here. Someone tell me what happens if I fail or don't finish in time?

Now for that meme n_isfor_neville tagged me for, in which I choose 16 celebrities I would do in a heartbeat and show you how gorgeous they are:

1. Jensen Ackles. For him to not be at the top of my list would be like for Sam to not be at the top of Dean's [platonic list of people he loves].


2. Misha Collins. (Bet you didn't see that one coming.)


3. Rahm Motherfucking Emanuel. Politicians can be celebs too, kay?


4. Jamie Bamber. He's British and he shoots things in vipers. 'nuff said.


5. Kevin Zegers. If anyone has ever come close to being as pretty as Jensen, it's him.


6. Jared Padalecki. Even though he's like three times bigger than me, which I imagine would make it awkward..


7. Shia LaBeouf. Love his boy-next-door vibe. ♥


8. Jim Sturgess. Very cute when flirty, very hot when pissed off.


9. Michael Trucco. Arms! *_*


10. James Callis. I will never get over how adorable this man is.


11. Jeffrey Dean Morgan. (God, it's no wonder I love SPN so much..)


12. Daniel Radcliffe. NOT THAT MUCH YOUNGER THAN ME, I SWEAR. British!


13. Johnny Depp. Come on, who wouldn't have sex with him?


14. Patrick Dempsey. McDreamy!


15. Milo Ventimiglia. Not such a big Heroes fan anymore, but he's fun to look at.




16. Brian Littrell. Shut up and don't judge. :P


ETA: OLD PICTURE, BUT WHATEVER. DEAN, SMIRKING UP AT THE CLOUDS WITH THAT FUCKING HARD-ON, TAUNTING A CERTAIN ANGEL CHILLING UP THERE. FDS;JALFKS;JDLKF! Thanks to katrinaswift for allowing me to rediscover it. XD


ETA2: I just -- oh my god, Kim Manners. this is. no. I typed a ":(" after that out of habit, but how fucking pathetic emoticons are when things matter.

Comments

[kalikahuntress.livejournal.com]

I have faith that you can pull this off, and just looking at all the meta your Dean/Castiel post generated it won't be hard to do it. I was glad for the discussion that individual prompted but I knew nothing would change his/her mind, since sadly from what I got from the post, the poster has a very narrow view of sexuality and that people can be in relationships where there romantic feelings between two people and nothing ever happens. But that is most people so I kept my mouth shut mostly.
I would sleep with everyone on your list except for McSteamy. I don't know, he seems nice but boring. Then again if he was naked in front of me, would I care if I thought he was boring? Probably not.

[dangerous-47.livejournal.com]

Dude, McSteamy is a totally different character. ;)

Dempsey is McDreamy. lol. Just pointing that out. Hehe.

This is McSteamy: Eric Dane (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mcsteamy)

[tracy.livejournal.com]

Aww, thanks for the vote of confidence, I appreciate the encouragement like you have no idea. ♥

A comment (s)he made to me conceded that given enough believable preslash, it could happen, but from all the other comments I read I'd have to agree with you. Some people just can't see Dean with a male at all, so. *shrug*

Hahha, it was actually Enchanted that got me more than Grey's Anatomy, he was adorable in that movie.

[dangerous-47.livejournal.com]

Yay!!!

I can not wait to read your thing. :D I'm sure you'll rock it, and if you need a cheerleader I'm there. Ya know? :D

*Thumbs up*

Love that pic of JA. All those freckles. Yum. :D

About nr. 3. *Points at avi, then walks away innocently* He's way awesome.

Haha. Man, you were a BSB fan? XD I was too. Some of the songs make me cringe now, but lots of them I still find good. Ya know catchy and all that. Heh. :D

Plus I once thought Brian was totally the hottest one. Heh. I thought Nick just looked the least hot out of them. XD Then he grew and he wasn't that bad, but then I was all oooh, Kevin is NICE. XD

Sooooo, no judging here. lmao.

[tracy.livejournal.com]

Dude. <33333333333333333333333333 SO MUCH. Thank you! It's.. setting a high goal, and plus I have terrible attention span when it comes to writing, but I guess we'll see, eh?

That's got to be one of my all-time favourite pictures of Jensen ever. gah.

RAHM. ♥

LOL I WAS SO OBSESSED WITH BSB/BRIAN IN MIDDLE SCHOOL. oh my god, so embarrassing, but childhood crushes die hard. I think my second would've been AJ. XD

[tracy.livejournal.com]

Ahh omg, have absolutely no experience writing longer fic. So we'll see, and thanks so much! <3

[vichan.livejournal.com]

YAY BIG BANG!! \o/ We can be cheerleaders for each other!

[tracy.livejournal.com]

IT WAS ALL YOUR FAULT. I'd been doing just fine, minding my own business, but then your plug in deancastiel was the last straw that made me click, and then the rest was downhill. At least I convinced myself to give it a few days and not make rash decisions, though.

Indeed we will! :D

[illuminations.livejournal.com]

slkdjfsldkjf BRIAN LITTRELL!!!!! AHHHHH.

He was my favorite.

[tracy.livejournal.com]

HAHHAHA GOOD. HE WAS CLEARLY THE HOTTEST.

[littlestclouds.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you signed up for Big Bang! I'm pleased at all the people on my flist who've gotten sucked in signed up. :D

[tracy.livejournal.com]

I'm just relieved you and a lot of other people on my flist are in it with me! <3

[katrinaswift.livejournal.com]

I am not judging you for Brian but I am for DanRad.


God, why don't you just add Elijah into the mix and they can stare at you with their creepy, creepy eyes.

[tracy.livejournal.com]

Hahahha HE DOESN'T STARE NEARLY AS CREEPILY AS ELIJAH. DanRad is cute. :|

[themadfish.livejournal.com]

Hah! I'm up to ep. 403! Another day or two and I'll be reading fic.

[tracy.livejournal.com]

You are FAST. <3333

Wheee, I hope you're liking Castiel! XD

[prongsy.livejournal.com]

1 - That person was stupid. Seriously, if you can see ANY slash, any at all, then you can see Dean/Castiel. So s/he admitting to being ok with slash in a couple of other fandoms means s/he should have been ok with it here. The eye-sex is so frickin' blatant I can't even make this shit up.

2 - I approve of your top three choices and would have probably done the exact same three (in the exact same order) at this current junction. Jensen is ALWAYS number one.

3 - Though I would have, probably, peppered in Cillian Murphy, John Rhys Meyers, Gareth David Lloyd and Legolas (not Orland Bloom, though he's ok, too... but the frickin ELF of EPIC HOTNESS *___*).

4 - I WILL read your story and I WILL like it. No shit. You write your Dean/Cas in a way I feel speaks directly to me (and selfishly I pretend it is just for me... MINE! *clings to fics*). If anyone is able to make that epic staple, it'd be you, lovey. I believe in you!

[tracy.livejournal.com]

1. Hahha, that person just seemed.. awfully determined to not see it, despite asking for reasons. Maybe our lack of "convincing answers" just further justified his/her views on why they can't be slashy?

2. I've lost the past few months of my life between the three of them. T_T

3. LEGOLAS. with his freaky, beautiful hair and his dark eyebrows. Oh god, I watched the tail end of RotK with my friend last month and we just couldn't stop laughing at all of Legolas's dramatic elvenly looks, hahahaha. I would also do him in a heartbeat, though.

4. NO PRESSURE OR ANYTHING. :"> But seriously, thank you enormously, they actually ARE sort of for you because everything you've said has really molded and set the characters in my head. There would be no attempt at an epic staple at all without you. If and when I do actually sit down to start writing (probably not for a couple of weeks at least), please please please let me send you bits and give me your opinion? I hate to ask anyone in particular, but it sort of has to be you, see, and I CAN'T DO THIS ALONE. :(

[big-heart-june.livejournal.com]

YOU WILL NOT FAIL, BB, NO FREAKIN' WAY, I ABSOLUTELY KNOW IT!!! ♥! And I'm thrilled to bits you have entered! *claps hands excitedly* Wheeeeeeee!! <3333!

I LOVE LOVE LOVE a lot of your choices! 1 & 2 are, OF COURSE!, right there on top of my list too <333333333! And I must say Rahm is pretty damn gorgeous too! And omg, that last pic of Jensen! *stares and licks* and I have to go to work soon! lmfao. Jared (although I'm tiny too! lol), Milo, Johnny D and JDM I'd so 'do' in an instant too..
I will do this later this evening too, it's fun!

Thanks for making my morning, my lovely BB! ILU! ♥

[tracy.livejournal.com]

JUNE! *TACKLES* Good morning! I haven't even gone to sleep yet, lol, though I intend to as soon as I finish replying to this comment.

Omg, have I ever told you how much all your encouragement and support means to me? It means a lot to me, seriously. ♥♥♥ So, thanks, bb, and I haven't forgotten your Latin fic! Life is sort of hectic right now, but there's that and one other short fic I want to write before I start on this epic one.

I'm sure a third of my flist agrees with me on 1 and 2, hahaha <33333! Glad I could give you something pretty to look at before you have to head to work! :D :D :D

ILU2!

[strangeandcharm.livejournal.com]

Yay! You signed up! And I love your reasoning to DEATH. I also find it a little frustrating that Dean will go from (as you so beautifully put it) "I'm the one who gripped you tight and raised you from perdition" to "oh god fuck me" with barely an eyeblink inbetween. I'm sure I've written it myself, too, so I'm hardly blameless. But in the context of the show, how the hell would that happen? I think it would take some life or death event or something - Dean's straight, we all know that, but something could push him over the edge, in the same manner as the illness in 'Yellow Fever' turned him into Flirty McFlirtyson.

I followed that thread the other day with the person who couldn't see the Dean/Castiel slash and thought there were some brilliant arguments, and after re-watching all of Castiel's scenes this weekend (I had visitors, it would have been rude not to...) I'm more than confident that the slash is AS OBVIOUS AS A VERY OBVIOUS THING. It's really down to the viewer whether they want to see it or not. Personally I don't see any Sam/Dean at all, while people I've watched the show with have been squeeing madly over it, so it's all a question of perception.

And hell, who'd deny themself the chance to imagine nekkid Dean/Castiel in their mind's eye? CRAZINESS!

Thanks for reccing the Melting 'verse BTW - I'm still chuffed to pieces that you enjoyed it! It was 103,000 words and I loved writing every goddamn one of them, so I'm sure you can manage 20,000 and love it too. It's not as daunting as it looks, honest!

Also? We share 6 celebrities. I thought it would be more, but I'm still wavering on Rahm and haven't liked Milo since he got rid of the floppy hair. /shallow

[tracy.livejournal.com]

Nnngh, I blame you and vichan. :P But yay, I'm so pleased you like the idea! I sort of envision this as being a very character-driven story, so there probably won't be too much plotty stuff beyond the natural progression of the apocalypse.. certainly nothing, ah, too convenient that would feel like a shortcut or cop-out, I hope. Except maybe there's a moment of (very mild, by your standards) Castiel!whumpage to make Dean realize, beyond that Alistair thing in H&H, that Castiel isn't some unfathomably powerful entity. I think there really needs to be that transition in Dean's mind from "ancient, biblical creature" to someone he can at least begin to understand, and Dean understands weaknesses and mortality.

SERIOUSLY. It's so obvious I'm positive they meant for it to be obvious, and if this wasn't a CW show I'm sure they'd probably write slash right into it. In which case I wouldn't even need to write this fic at all. :)) As for Sam/Dean.. I've read some arguments from psych folks that say they fit the mold for incestuous relationships, and the arguments make a lot of sense so I can see it, but this is a case where I just choose not to.

INORITE? Clearly these people aren't slash fans -- if they were, they'd be all up in this shit.

Definitely one of the best fics in this fandom, bb. And holy shit, that's a lot of words. O.O Suddenly a fifth of that doesn't seem like much at all, you're right. I wonder if it'll even be enough to cover everything that needs to happen.

I'm curious, which six? RAHM IS SO SEXY IN HIS BADASSERY, WHAT ARE YOU WAVERING ABOUT? And yeah, I agree about Milo -- his season 1 hair was much hotter. :(

[blaithacs.livejournal.com]

OMG, I am so happy you decided to sign up for the spn_j2_bigbang challenge and write DEAN/CASTIEL FIIIIC. So, now, I think we have 20 Dean/Castiel fics (a couple might end up Jensen/Misha and 3 to 5 authors are undecided on the D/C pairing) --heh, I am anxiously waiting for them to be written already so that I can read them all XD

<33

[tracy.livejournal.com]

Hahaha, it could never have been any other pairing! Only 20, that's pretty sad, actually, 20 out of.. hundreds and hundreds, and out of those how many won't actually be finished? (will mine be?) :( But yay, thanks for the encouragement! ♥

Also can't wait to read them all, wheee! Although I haven't even read all the novel length stories out there yet, going to get on that, too.

[tracy.livejournal.com]

Aww, that means a lot to me, actually, thank you so much for saying so! ♥ I just hope my attention span doesn't die on this.. I can write short fics just fine, but I've absolutely no experience with something longer that I actually have to plan out. Anyway, we'll see, and I hope I don't disappoint!

Right, that's what I'm thinking -- Dean would fall in love with him regardless of what vessel he possessed, and though I'm a slasher I would probably ship them even if it was a female vessel (as long as she wasn't a terrible actress and character like a certain angle, *cough*). Misha, though, he does make it a lot easier, doesn't he? XD

[firstlady1408.livejournal.com]

Johnney Depp *drool*....some good guys on that list, though granted I don't know many of them :-P I did a similar post on my LJ, see what you think ;-) http://firstlady1408.livejournal.com/37307.html

[tracy.livejournal.com]

PICARD! ♥ And Mel Gibson, mmm, I was so in love with him in Braveheart. Your guys are generally older than mine, but there are some good looking ones for sure! *_* And the women are sexy too (MARY OMG), it's pretty unfortunate I'm so straight. D:

[karaz.livejournal.com]

A type, you has one. I agree with about half of your list, not that I'd kick the other half out of bed.

ETA - OMG. IS THAT DEAN PEEN?

[dangerous-47.livejournal.com]

Yup. ;)

[taurenova.livejournal.com]

Welcome to the BigBang Madhouse. That makes, well, a bunch of people on my flist (and myself) engaged in it now. We can support each other! *waves tiny flag*

You can totally pull this off. You have a great feel for Dean/Castiel. *nods emphatically*

(And surely you're at least not like me and haven't signed up for the Crossover BigBang as well. Jen = Still the Maddest)

Aside: Oh, Jamie. I'm so glad you're coming home and being British again. If you're shirtless even once in Law and Order UK I'll be over the moon.*(Don't get me wrong - I love BSG - but I miss British Jamie. And I can't even watch my Hornblower DVDs to see him because my boyfriend borrowed them. *sighs*)

[tracy.livejournal.com]

Yay, yes, this unofficial support group thing rocks so much. :D <333333333333333

Aww, thanks so much for the vote of confidence, bb. *loves all over you*

Hahaha no, one is more than enough for me to deal with. I am actually sort of in awe of you for even thinking of doing both. *_*

YES, it's about time we got more of that deliciously adorable accent of his. I don't know when L&O:UK starts, but I can't wait for it anyway. Actually I saw the slash potential between him and Anders, but never really got into it because BSG fanfic just isn't my thing -- the show is so perfect already just as it is, and anyway I love Lee/Kara too much. So, yes, I'm really hoping for some slashy subtext in his next show! :D

[darksilvercat.livejournal.com]

I AM SO EXCITED BY HOW MANY OF THE AWESOME WRITERS ON MY FLIST ARE DOING DEAN/CASTIEL BIG BANG FIC!!! \o/\o/\o/\o/\o/

I'm not doing it myself as I don't think I'd have the time (and I fail at long epic fanfic) but I'm going to be there on the sidelines waving my pompoms and cheering everyone on!

I think I agree with about 6 of your list, maybe one or two others but that would very much depend. I do like these kinds of questions, and I feel I should give much, much thought to the merits of each celeb before judging them......

[tracy.livejournal.com]

ME TOO, ACTUALLY, TO THE POINT WHERE I WAS FEELING SORT OF LEFT OUT. :))

Hahha technically I don't have time either, grad school isn't exactly conducive to this sort of thing, but oh well. I'm sure we'll need the cheering and support! <3

Oh? I'm curious, which six? And in that case I tag you. :D :D

[mrstotten.livejournal.com]

I did have a big long post already written then LJ ate my post :)

Have to agree with most of the guys on your list, although would have to squeeze David Boreanaz in there somewhere. Also what are 4, 5 and 9 in cos they are HOT, number 5 looks semi familiar but cant place him :(

Yay another big banger (do you think they intentially meant it to sound that dirty?) i'm sure your fic will rock like a rocky thing :) looking forward to reading it

Mags

[tracy.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I notice LJ died for a few minutes there. D:

David Boreanaz is extremely hot, but I never watched Buffy, so. :(

4 and 9 are both in Battlestar Galactica, which you should watch anyway because it's the greatest TV show in the history of TV shows. XD 5 is the kid from Air Bud, lolol. But he's since grown up, obviously, and has been in some movies. My favourites are Transamerica, It's a Boy Girl Thing, and Fifty Dead Men Walking. He's also guest starred on House, Smallville, and a few other TV shows.

LOL, the original big bang was actually really a reference to the gigantic, beginning-of-the-universe explosion, though even I prefer to think of its other implications sometimes. XD Thank you so much for the vote of confidence, seriously. ♥!

[waxbean.livejournal.com]

DEAN'S COCK!

I can't handle this -- must go run around in circles.



ps -- I know, so tragic about Kim Manners.

[waxbean.livejournal.com]

oh, and yippee to you about Big Bang -- let me know if you need any beta work -- I'm a timely editor!

[commodoresexual.livejournal.com]

I HAVE FAITH IN YOU PRETTY PONY YOU CAN FLY!

In other words, Dumbo, use the magic feather and write us an epic love story.

Or ask us to help you and we'll all write an epic love story and it'll be fantastic and awesome.

[tracy.livejournal.com]

YOU should sign up for it. Or don't, but write us an epic love story anyway. Actually you already ARE, yay!

[wicked-g.livejournal.com]

Oh, god. I love you and your fantastic posts. YES! I am so freakin' glad we're friends.

[tracy.livejournal.com]

Hahahha as am I, bb! It's about time, really. :D ♥♥♥!