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tracy_loo_whoI am becoming so prolific. :)) Except not, because three fics in three weeks isn't much at all, but this has never happened before. What have you done to me, Kripke/Jensen/Misha?
But first, WELCOME to my new friends from![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
deancastiel! I AM SO HAPPY YOU GUYS ARE HERE, SRSLY. ♥♥♥! Make yourselves at home, spam me, I'll spam you, and I hope I don't annoy you too much! :D
Oh, oh, one more thing, SOMEONE DREW ME AND SARAH ART AThd_holidays! It's adorable, omgomgomg. DRACO IS WEARING EARMUFFS. !!! First time we've ever gotten art, how exciting! *_*
Wait, I lied, ONE MORE THING, I PROMISE. I haven't seen much talk about this on my flist, but is anyone (other than![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
kitsu84 and breakinporcelan) going to Creation Con in NJ next March? You know, to see MISHA and Jared? I would love to meet any and all of you, and I am trying to figure out which package I should buy!
Okay, I'm done, here is some fic:
Title: Where All Paths Lead
Pairing: Dean/Castiel
Rating: R
Word Count: ~1,300
Notes: As per request, I've since written four porny outtakes to this fic. They're linked to in the story, but if you feel inclined to read them, it would probably be best to do so after you finish this one. :)
♥♥♥: You can now listen to this fic in podfic form, read bytehopheliac! :D
Summary: Castiel will fall in love with Dean, and Uriel is the first to know.
When Dean's lips meet Anna's, Castiel is watching him. Uriel is watching Castiel. He knows how this will go.
***
Castiel will realize he envies, and it will consume him because it's the only human emotion he knows.
"Careful, brother," Uriel will say, but Castiel will not be careful.
He will make up excuses to spend more time with Dean. Dean will not be impressed, so Castiel will retreat to the shadows and watch.
***
The watching will not last very long, because Castiel will not be able to stand by every night and do nothing while Dean's dreams torment him.
He will sit too close and wake Dean from Hell with a touch to the forehead, and Dean will flinch away and swear at him. Then he will make sarcastic comments until Castiel's fingertips brush his forehead again. Dean will sleep peacefully for the rest of the night.
***
This will happen several nights in a row. Castiel will not tell him that the intermediate step isn't necessary. He doesn't have to wake Dean up to dispel his nightmares. He does have to wake Dean up for Dean to remember his visit.
***
Dean will stop flinching away and swearing at him. He will still make sarcastic comments, but right before Castiel's fingers touch his skin again, he will mumble, "Thanks."
Castiel will feel gratified and sit beside him for hours, until he senses that Sam's bladder is about to wake him.
He will resent Sam's bladder, a little. Then he will realize that he resents Sam's bladder and he will pray to their Father.
***
Sam won't be there, one night. He will be next door with the demon, and Castiel will be the only other one in the room when he wakes Dean.
When Castiel withdraws his hand from Dean's forehead, Dean will catch his wrist. Their eyes will meet in the darkness and Castiel will understand that this is as close as Dean can come to asking him to stay.
So Castiel will lie down beside him, and it will be awkward because the bed will be too small and he will still have his trench coat and tie and shoes on. For once, Dean will not say anything. He will let Castiel curl around him and feel blanketed by more than just the vessel's arm. The terror from his nightmare will fade, his breathing will slow, and he will fall asleep naturally.
Castiel will stay.
***
Dean will wake up late the next morning, and Castiel will open his mouth to say something.
"Don't," Dean will cut in. "Just, don't. No chick flick moments, okay?"
Castiel will carefully extract his limbs from Dean's and get out of bed. He will not say anything.
***
He will begin to look forward to the nights Sam spends away from his brother.
Sometimes, though, Castiel will be needed elsewhere, and Uriel will be able to see his agitation as clearly as he can see his vessel.
"Careful, brother," Uriel will say, but Castiel will not be careful. He will be more impatient, more quick to smite.
And then he will go to Dean.
***
They will fight together, Castiel and Dean. Angel and human. They will have each other's backs, and they will save each other more than once.
Uriel will sneer, because neither of them would need saving if they weren't so occupied with worrying about the other.
***
Another seal will be broken, and the man Castiel is inhabiting will also break. His soul will become sick from the things he has seen, and Castiel will let him go gently. The soul will float away, and Castiel will not know where it goes; only that it won't be to the demons in Hell, but it won't be to the angels in Heaven, either.
He will trust their Father to take care of his friend's soul.
***
Castiel will stop wearing his trench coat and tie and shoes to bed.
Dean will smirk at Castiel's silk boxers until his smirk is covered by lips that aren't so chapped after all, and he will learn the taste of Castiel's mouth and skin and come. Castiel will arch his body, throw his head back so hard the headboard cracks, and discover the pleasures of the flesh.
He will touch every inch of Dean's skin, reverently and all at once with tongue and hands and wings. The overwhelming sensory overload will be too much for Dean's human body, will reduce him to a writhing, incoherently pleading mess in the cocoon of wings he can't see but can certainly, certainly feel. He will actually pass out when he comes.
Castiel will hold him and privately enjoy what he guesses Dean would consider to be a chick flick moment.
***
It will happen everywhere: against the wall (hard and fast), in Dean's car (quiet enough so Sam won't hear from the motel), on a grassy hill that wouldn't still be there if it weren't for them (breathless and intoxicated on triumph), in the ruins of a town they fail to save (dirty and desperate).
There won't be any more chick flick moments.
***
Envy will not be the only human emotion Castiel knows. He will learn them one by one until he knows them all, through Dean. Because of Dean. And he will want, more than anything, to tear out his grace and spend the rest of his mortal years with Dean.
"You can't!" Dean will yell, scared and furious.
And Castiel will whisper, "I know."
The war will not let them be selfish, and Castiel will grow to hate it.
***
Uriel will be impressed with Castiel's smiting powers.
"Careful, brother," he will say, but Castiel will not be careful.
***
There will be another chick flick moment.
"Maybe," Dean will say, very, very softly into Castiel's hair. "Maybe after the war is over."
Castiel's damp eyelashes will brush against Dean's chest as he closes his eyes and says, "The war will never be over."
***
Uriel doesn't know what will happen after that.
Maybe Dean will die young. Maybe Dean won't die young, and he will love Castiel until he is old. More likely he will fall out of love with Castiel, Uriel thinks with contempt.
Human beings and their emotions are so fleeting, after all. Their passions are so fierce, so strong and so bright they can shake the foundations of Heaven and Hell and Earth, but so fleeting. How many humans have promised forever with absolute and heart-shattering sincerity, only to let the moment pass and the feelings fade? Until there is nothing more than the dull echo of emotions they once felt, brought back occasionally by memories of the people they once loved and the lives they once wanted? Uriel hates them.
Dean's passion is more fierce than most, he has to admit, so maybe he will not fall out of love with Castiel, just as he will never stop devoting himself to his brother.
It won't matter. His lifespan is scarcely longer than that of a mayfly's, and what of Castiel after that? It is not in the nature of immortal beings to change, and Uriel knows his brother will not fall in love with another. Will not simply stop loving Dean just because Dean is dead and his soul has gone.
Castiel marvels at the humans now, but Uriel wonders how many thousands of years it will be before Castiel comes to scorn them all for not being Dean Winchester.
***
Dean's lips part from Anna's, and Castiel is still watching. He hasn't blinked. Uriel is still watching, too, but he doesn't tell his brother to be careful. There is nothing he can say that will change anything, because it is impossible for an angel to walk among humans and not fall for one. Castiel didn't ask, before they came, why their father hadn't let them walk on Earth for two thousand years. But Uriel knows he will find out.
fin.
But first, WELCOME to my new friends from
deancastiel! I AM SO HAPPY YOU GUYS ARE HERE, SRSLY. ♥♥♥! Make yourselves at home, spam me, I'll spam you, and I hope I don't annoy you too much! :DOh, oh, one more thing, SOMEONE DREW ME AND SARAH ART AT
hd_holidays! It's adorable, omgomgomg. DRACO IS WEARING EARMUFFS. !!! First time we've ever gotten art, how exciting! *_*Wait, I lied, ONE MORE THING, I PROMISE. I haven't seen much talk about this on my flist, but is anyone (other than
kitsu84 and breakinporcelan) going to Creation Con in NJ next March? You know, to see MISHA and Jared? I would love to meet any and all of you, and I am trying to figure out which package I should buy!Okay, I'm done, here is some fic:
Title: Where All Paths Lead
Pairing: Dean/Castiel
Rating: R
Word Count: ~1,300
Notes: As per request, I've since written four porny outtakes to this fic. They're linked to in the story, but if you feel inclined to read them, it would probably be best to do so after you finish this one. :)
♥♥♥: You can now listen to this fic in podfic form, read by
tehopheliac! :DSummary: Castiel will fall in love with Dean, and Uriel is the first to know.
When Dean's lips meet Anna's, Castiel is watching him. Uriel is watching Castiel. He knows how this will go.
***
Castiel will realize he envies, and it will consume him because it's the only human emotion he knows.
"Careful, brother," Uriel will say, but Castiel will not be careful.
He will make up excuses to spend more time with Dean. Dean will not be impressed, so Castiel will retreat to the shadows and watch.
***
The watching will not last very long, because Castiel will not be able to stand by every night and do nothing while Dean's dreams torment him.
He will sit too close and wake Dean from Hell with a touch to the forehead, and Dean will flinch away and swear at him. Then he will make sarcastic comments until Castiel's fingertips brush his forehead again. Dean will sleep peacefully for the rest of the night.
***
This will happen several nights in a row. Castiel will not tell him that the intermediate step isn't necessary. He doesn't have to wake Dean up to dispel his nightmares. He does have to wake Dean up for Dean to remember his visit.
***
Dean will stop flinching away and swearing at him. He will still make sarcastic comments, but right before Castiel's fingers touch his skin again, he will mumble, "Thanks."
Castiel will feel gratified and sit beside him for hours, until he senses that Sam's bladder is about to wake him.
He will resent Sam's bladder, a little. Then he will realize that he resents Sam's bladder and he will pray to their Father.
***
Sam won't be there, one night. He will be next door with the demon, and Castiel will be the only other one in the room when he wakes Dean.
When Castiel withdraws his hand from Dean's forehead, Dean will catch his wrist. Their eyes will meet in the darkness and Castiel will understand that this is as close as Dean can come to asking him to stay.
So Castiel will lie down beside him, and it will be awkward because the bed will be too small and he will still have his trench coat and tie and shoes on. For once, Dean will not say anything. He will let Castiel curl around him and feel blanketed by more than just the vessel's arm. The terror from his nightmare will fade, his breathing will slow, and he will fall asleep naturally.
Castiel will stay.
***
Dean will wake up late the next morning, and Castiel will open his mouth to say something.
"Don't," Dean will cut in. "Just, don't. No chick flick moments, okay?"
Castiel will carefully extract his limbs from Dean's and get out of bed. He will not say anything.
***
He will begin to look forward to the nights Sam spends away from his brother.
Sometimes, though, Castiel will be needed elsewhere, and Uriel will be able to see his agitation as clearly as he can see his vessel.
"Careful, brother," Uriel will say, but Castiel will not be careful. He will be more impatient, more quick to smite.
And then he will go to Dean.
***
They will fight together, Castiel and Dean. Angel and human. They will have each other's backs, and they will save each other more than once.
Uriel will sneer, because neither of them would need saving if they weren't so occupied with worrying about the other.
***
Another seal will be broken, and the man Castiel is inhabiting will also break. His soul will become sick from the things he has seen, and Castiel will let him go gently. The soul will float away, and Castiel will not know where it goes; only that it won't be to the demons in Hell, but it won't be to the angels in Heaven, either.
He will trust their Father to take care of his friend's soul.
***
Castiel will stop wearing his trench coat and tie and shoes to bed.
Dean will smirk at Castiel's silk boxers until his smirk is covered by lips that aren't so chapped after all, and he will learn the taste of Castiel's mouth and skin and come. Castiel will arch his body, throw his head back so hard the headboard cracks, and discover the pleasures of the flesh.
He will touch every inch of Dean's skin, reverently and all at once with tongue and hands and wings. The overwhelming sensory overload will be too much for Dean's human body, will reduce him to a writhing, incoherently pleading mess in the cocoon of wings he can't see but can certainly, certainly feel. He will actually pass out when he comes.
Castiel will hold him and privately enjoy what he guesses Dean would consider to be a chick flick moment.
***
It will happen everywhere: against the wall (hard and fast), in Dean's car (quiet enough so Sam won't hear from the motel), on a grassy hill that wouldn't still be there if it weren't for them (breathless and intoxicated on triumph), in the ruins of a town they fail to save (dirty and desperate).
There won't be any more chick flick moments.
***
Envy will not be the only human emotion Castiel knows. He will learn them one by one until he knows them all, through Dean. Because of Dean. And he will want, more than anything, to tear out his grace and spend the rest of his mortal years with Dean.
"You can't!" Dean will yell, scared and furious.
And Castiel will whisper, "I know."
The war will not let them be selfish, and Castiel will grow to hate it.
***
Uriel will be impressed with Castiel's smiting powers.
"Careful, brother," he will say, but Castiel will not be careful.
***
There will be another chick flick moment.
"Maybe," Dean will say, very, very softly into Castiel's hair. "Maybe after the war is over."
Castiel's damp eyelashes will brush against Dean's chest as he closes his eyes and says, "The war will never be over."
***
Uriel doesn't know what will happen after that.
Maybe Dean will die young. Maybe Dean won't die young, and he will love Castiel until he is old. More likely he will fall out of love with Castiel, Uriel thinks with contempt.
Human beings and their emotions are so fleeting, after all. Their passions are so fierce, so strong and so bright they can shake the foundations of Heaven and Hell and Earth, but so fleeting. How many humans have promised forever with absolute and heart-shattering sincerity, only to let the moment pass and the feelings fade? Until there is nothing more than the dull echo of emotions they once felt, brought back occasionally by memories of the people they once loved and the lives they once wanted? Uriel hates them.
Dean's passion is more fierce than most, he has to admit, so maybe he will not fall out of love with Castiel, just as he will never stop devoting himself to his brother.
It won't matter. His lifespan is scarcely longer than that of a mayfly's, and what of Castiel after that? It is not in the nature of immortal beings to change, and Uriel knows his brother will not fall in love with another. Will not simply stop loving Dean just because Dean is dead and his soul has gone.
Castiel marvels at the humans now, but Uriel wonders how many thousands of years it will be before Castiel comes to scorn them all for not being Dean Winchester.
***
Dean's lips part from Anna's, and Castiel is still watching. He hasn't blinked. Uriel is still watching, too, but he doesn't tell his brother to be careful. There is nothing he can say that will change anything, because it is impossible for an angel to walk among humans and not fall for one. Castiel didn't ask, before they came, why their father hadn't let them walk on Earth for two thousand years. But Uriel knows he will find out.
fin.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2008-12-17 11:15 pm (UTC)That story was beautiful and the ending was just perfection.
no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 04:30 am (UTC)(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2008-12-17 11:17 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 04:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-17 11:23 pm (UTC)"The war will never be over."
Ugh, so sad and beautiful. This was my favorite scene. Thank you so much for sharing. *adds to memories*
no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 04:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-17 11:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 04:34 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-17 11:25 pm (UTC)So basically I really really like this and there are too many wonderful parts to mention individually. Congratulations on making me like Uriel for once. :)
no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 04:37 am (UTC)Anyway, THANK YOU so much, I'm thrilled you enjoyed it! :D
no subject
Date: 2008-12-17 11:29 pm (UTC)It flowed so well, each instance leading perfectly into the next, rounding out with Uriel's assumptions and observations. Seeing Castiel wanting to become mortal, but not able to, knowing he probably never could even as he wishes to for Dean... *sniff* Truly beautiful.
Thank you so much for writing this! *mems*
no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 05:27 am (UTC)Thank you! :"> :D :D
no subject
Date: 2008-12-17 11:32 pm (UTC)I love how it's not a "falling" story, it's just a story about time and want and need and immortality
part of my head is singing "who wants to live forever?"
no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 05:29 am (UTC)Certainly not me. Life is only beautiful because it ends, or something like that, right? Heh, thank you so much! I think you saw in this exactly what I wanted to show, so I am all *_*-y, hahha. ♥!
(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2008-12-17 11:32 pm (UTC)He will trust their Father to take care of his friend's soul.
I love love LOVE the idea of Castiel seeing the guy he's inhabiting as his friend! And then just letting him 'float away'. Beautiful!
I absolutely adore this fic. It's going in my memories. And whatever happens on the show over the next year (or more), this is kinda canon for me now. Thank you!
no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 05:50 am (UTC)Heee, I just can't see Castiel completely disregarding the guy and not giving a shit about him, so I'm really gad you enjoyed that!
this is kinda canon for me now
SO FLATTERED, you have no idea! Omg. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
no subject
Date: 2008-12-17 11:32 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 05:56 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-17 11:33 pm (UTC)This is breathtakingly beautiful, and yet at the same time, it shatters your heart... because you know there will not a happy ending for these two in the series.
Also:
There is nothing he can say that will change anything, because it is impossible for an angel to walk among humans and not fall for one.
This has to be my favorite line out of the entire story because it's true - there's no way Castiel is not going to fall for Dean. That much has already been shown in series; it's CANON.
Love this, bb. Love it.
no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 06:01 am (UTC)Thank you so much for saying such nice things to me! And I am so, so happy you see in them what I see in them, seriously. ♥♥♥!
(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2008-12-17 11:42 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 06:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 06:06 am (UTC)I'm so glad it worked for you, especially regarding Uriel because I don't even like him myself, hahahha.
Man, I hope Kripke addresses that in the show, somehow. I faffed around for so long trying to decide what should happen to the soul. :">
no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 12:09 am (UTC)*smooshes you tight*
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Date: 2008-12-18 06:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 12:20 am (UTC)I especially love how you were able to write emotional attatchment when it comes to humans, it does make you think that when the war is over and if Dean still lives, what will become of his angel? you can understand Uriel's distaste for Man's fickleness when it comes to caring for another. kick ass job on this :)
no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 06:10 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 12:33 am (UTC)WOO!!!!!!!
no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 06:11 am (UTC)(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 12:48 am (UTC)All it needs now is for this line, "He will resent Sam's bladder, a little" to be made into an icon! Tru Factz!
Ta-Da!
Date: 2008-12-18 01:24 am (UTC)And while I was making that one, I thought it'd be fun to do another in a similar vein only borrowing heavily from Firefly (because Whedon is EPIC!):
Re: Ta-Da!
From:Re: Ta-Da!
From:Re: two thousand years of no action
Date: 2008-12-18 06:21 am (UTC)But more to the point, THANK YOU!
I have never written in future tense before, so I'm incredibly relieved it worked for you! And awww, the bit about Dean not asking but asking Castiel to stay was my personal favorite, actually, so it makes me so happy you liked it too! ♥
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Date: 2008-12-18 01:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 06:22 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 01:07 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 06:23 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 01:07 am (UTC)♥♥
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Date: 2008-12-18 06:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 01:10 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 06:26 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 01:14 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 06:27 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 01:26 am (UTC)And now I want Uriel/OC fic, romantic and schmoopy and epic and ending in death and angst and hate.
no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 06:31 am (UTC)This was secretly sort of meant to be a Uriel story masquerading as a Dean/Castiel story! :">
THANK YOU so much, omg. ♥!
no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 01:33 am (UTC)(p.s. Do you mind if I friend you? I've loved all your fics so far!)
no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 06:33 am (UTC)But in the meantime, THANK YOU! I'm so flattered you saw all of that in something I wrote! :">
Of course I don't mind, friend away! ♥
no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 01:44 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-12-18 06:36 am (UTC)